Developing Gratitude In Your Children

Developing Gratitude In Your ChildrenThanksgiving is a time when we often count our blessings. We encourage our children to list what they are most grateful to have.  On Thanksgiving Day, many families go around the dinner table to state something for which they are thankful.  It is a beautiful tradition, which too often starts and ends at the Thanksgiving Table.

“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” —Robert Brault

Although feeling thankful is a natural emotion, gratitude is a skill that needs to be developed through repetition, modeling, and positive reinforcement.  We must ask ourselves, “Are we appropriately teaching our children how to be grateful and are we modeling gratitude in our daily life?”

In the world we live in today, more than ever, our children need to develop their sense of gratitude. When one is grateful for the blessings in his life, he feels a sense of fulfillment and purpose.  With gratitude for the “small things” our children can grow up appreciating all that is given to them. In turn, they will want to give to others, as well.

“Robert Emmons, a leading gratitude researcher, has conducted multiple studies on the link between gratitude and well-being. His research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression.” States Amy Morin, in her article for Psychology Today: 7 Scientifically Proven Benefits of Gratitude.

Below we have listed several strategies for you to consider for helping develop true gratitude in your child and teen:

  1. Say Thank you” – this is the first step to teaching children to be grateful.  Give your child several opportunities to say, “Thank you” daily.
  2. Give Reminders – Often our children are used to us doing daily, mundane tasks for them, that they forget to be grateful- Remind them to be grateful by allowing them to see what would happen (or not happen) if you did not do these tasks. For example: if you don’t make their lunch for school, they would be hungry.
  3. Be Hands on – Give your children the hands on experience they need to develop gratitude. Let them help you with age appropriate chores, such as raking the leaves, washing the dishes, doing laundry, or vacuuming. This will allow them to better understand the work you do FOR them, helping to build gratitude.
  4. Be a positive role model- When your child wishes for something a friend has, whether it be materialistic or otherwise, remind your child of what he/she has at home.  For example, should your child say, “ I want the new video game that my friend has.” You can reply, “That sounds like a great game.  You have a lot of games that you barely play anymore.  Let’s go find one that you used to love playing, and play it together.  Lots of children do not have any video games. Would you like to donate one of yours to someone less fortunate?”
  5. Play “Best/Worst”-Each day I ask my children to identify their best and worst parts of their day. I try to remind them that their best parts almost always outweigh their worst parts, and to be grateful for the blessings in their day. 

Wishing you and your loved ones as a blessed holiday season.

With Gratitude,

Leigh Ann Errico

Amazing Grace!

Grace SmithThis month we introduce to you Grace Smith, as our Cape Kid for the month of October. Grace was chosen to represent our Cape Kids this month for her dedication to serving others, as well as her compassionate heart.

Grace is currently a Senior at Oxbridge Academy, in South Florida. She is a supportive teammate and dedicated player of the varsity Lacrosse team.  Her two passions are playing the trumpet, which she has been doing since the fourth grade, and helping others.

From a young age Grace’s parents instilled the idea of giving back to the community. She began volunteering with her father at the age of eight at St. George’s Soup Kitchen in Riviera Beach, Florida.  “Some of my favorite memories volunteering with my dad…” states Grace.

Grace SmithVolunteering with her father, while so young, allowed Grace to develop a deep desire to help others less fortunate than herself. Her most remarkable volunteer experience was on a mission trip to Costa Rica, through St. Mark’s School in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida.

During this mission experience, Grace helped to build beds for children who did not have an adequate place to sleep. She taught these young children academics, and played soccer with them every night. Grace was delighted to see the difference she made in these children’s lives through her service.

Continuing with her mission to help others, Grace began tutoring underprivileged children at The Lord’s Place in West Palm Beach, Florida. After a long school day, Grace spends this time helping children with their homework, developing their reading skills. They then share a meal and play outdoors.  “It’s the highlight of my week!” Grace exclaims.

During the summer months, when many of her peers are lounging beachside or away at camps, Grace spends every Thursday volunteering at Mary’s Table, a program developed by volunteers at St. Mary’s By The Sea Church, in Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey. There she serves a hot dinner, with a warm smile, and an open heart. She offers companionship to those who need it most.

When asked why she would want to “give up” part of her summer vacation to serve others, Grace immediately replied, “I enjoy the interaction with all the different people and like knowing I can help fulfill a need.”

Grace plans to continue her volunteer work throughout college, as well as her adulthood, as she vows to always make volunteering an important part of her life.

We commend you, Grace, for your service to those less fortunate. You simply are AMAZING.

Protecting our Children Online

Protecting our Children OnlineYesterday I received an email from my son’s elementary school principal informing parents that the school had an online safety presentation for their fourth and fifth grade students.  When asked how many of the students had spoken to someone whom they knew was a stranger online, about half of the children raised their hands.

WOW! That is scary!

As parents, we have been instilling the life lesson of “Stranger Danger” in our children from the time they were toddlers.  “Don’t speak to a stranger,” “Never get in a car with someone you don’t know,” and other important rules we implore our children follow to keep them safe.

Yet, HALF of these nine to eleven year olds admitted to talking to a stranger online. Mrs. Smith, Principal at Angelo L. Tomaso School in Warren, New Jersey urged parents to help by stating, “We need to work together to remain informed, diligent, and ahead of the game to guide our kids through their world of social media.”

Another abuse of social media is Cyber bullying. I’m curious as to how many of those fourth and fifth grade students would have raised their hands to indicate if they have been bullied online – or how many Middle and High Schoolers?

Our First Lady has pledged to work toward putting an end to bullying on social media. Mrs. Trump states, “We have to find a better way to talk to each other, to disagree with each other, to respect each other.”  (usatoday.com).  As parents, it is our job to teach our children this better way.

Keeping our children safe is paramount, both on and off-line. We need to help our children navigate technology, which includes video games, social media, and online chat rooms, in a way that will help, not hurt.

Below we have listed several ways to talk to your child about online safety. It’s never too early to discuss these strategies with your child. Openly talking with your child on a regular basis is key to keeping your child safe.

Discussion Topics for Online Safety:

  • Make the real World /Cyber World Connection: Instruct your children that if it’s not permitted in the “real world” it should not be done in the “Cyber World” i.e.: sharing personal information, making fun of someone, showing inappropriate photos of self or someone else.
  • Protect your Privacy: Never share your personal information online, including age, address, phone number, birthday.Allow your child to understand that he/she must tell you if someone is asking for this information online.
  • Know When to Let Go: Let your child know that if he/she is uncomfortable with anything presented online, it is encouraged to immediately leave that site and inform a parent or teacher.
  • Be Approachable: It is extremely important that your child understand that you are there to support and help him/her with any and all online issues. Allow your child to feel comfortable and secure when telling you details of online play.
  • Online Play to Stay: Create a list of rules with your child to help him stay safe online. Include sites and topics that are “green light” – can be used without adult guidance, “yellow light” – an adult needs to be present/an adult needs to be called to review and “red light” – sites and topics that are not to be viewed or discussed.

Online safety and Cyber bullying are topics discussed during our Hero Assembly. For more information about our program, please email leighann@wearthecapekids.com